So I was in PT yesterday and sadly, Waldorf and Statler weren’t there. My PT guy and I got right down to business, and let me tell you, it’s surprisingly challenging considering I’m not doing a whole heck of a lot.
The first time I ever had PT was because I had arthroscopic knee surgery when I was in college. I did the crutches thing for a while, but this was when I was in my 20’s with just myself to look after. It wasn’t so bad. The PT was intense because I had to get serious range of motion back in my leg. I had to learn how to bend it again. For anyone who has ever had any kind of injury, you become pretty timid when you have to engage that area again for the first time. Considering the amount of pain I’d been in post knee surgery, having to put it back to use gave me some pause. The therapists know this and they start you off relatively slowly. After a while, they amp up your drills to get you moving and grooving. My range of motion on my knee was coming along, but my PT person thought I wasn’t giving it 100%. I remember laying up on this table while she manipulated my leg for me. She mentioned something about degrees of flexion and the next thing I know, my knee is practically tucked up under my chin. Uh, you know how people say when they’re in pain, they see stars? Yeah, I say the whole Milky Way, and let me tell you, there weren’t no chocolate involved.
Keeping that in mind, this time around, I showed up in my gym clothes. I was ready to sweat through some leg lifts or walking lunges or something. I knew I would be walking in no time.
Not even close.
I’ve only been three times and the closest thing to cardio I’ve done is putting a crap-ton of marbles from the floor into a red solo cup. . .using my toes. The only reason I broke a sweat was because that entire exercise is an exercise in frustration and little else.
When I’m not showing off my pedal dexterity, I spend a lot of time getting my leg massaged. There are pros and cons to that, of course. Massage? that’s a pro. However, you know how in the winter time, lots of ladies like to hang up their razors and go au naturale in the leg hair department? I’m one of those ladies. Since I got somebody rubbing on my leg twice a week, I’m up to my knees in Nair on a regular basis. That’s a con for sure, but sometimes you gotta suck it up for the good of the masses. And don’t even get me started on my pedicure situation. Oy!
In order to avoid the potential awkward silences that can come while someone lotions up (it puts the lotion in the basket!) and massages your leg, you are constantly grasping at things to talk about. We’ve covered kids, restaurants, movies, education, and sport. Currently, my PT guy and I are coming up with a list of better stories to explain my accident since tripping over a trash bag pretty much sucks as a story and in real life.
Here’s what we’ve come up with so far:
Outta the way, snitches! (image) |
(image) |
The hubs and I are going out tonight to a reception at a gallery. I’m sure there will be someone whom I haven’t seen or never before met who will ask me what happened. I hope I can tell them with a straight face!
Which is your favorite? Which one should I use? Got any suggestions?